THC

Yes, I am now aware that THC is a drug. I grew up in Utah people.

My friend had her baby a few days ago and I had made her a pamphlet to give her when I went to meet her little guy. After I had made the whole thing Rob informed me that THC is a drug. The best part? My friend's hubby is a cop! He's never gonna let me live this one down.

And let me point out that after I was woken up by a 2:45 am phone call telling me her water broke... I was at her house exactly 3 minutes later. I so should be a fireman!

Anyways... This is her 4th baby so she's set on all things baby so I had to come up with something fun and different for a gift. When I gave it to her I told her that I got her into a very exclusive club because the owner owed me some favors.

So here's the pamphlet. I had a some good laughs making it. I cut out the pics and the stuff I wrote and glued it all to some construction paper folded into thirds. Enjoy!

The Hartshorn Club

-Have you recently had a baby?

-Have your mother and mother-in-law had to say goodbye to go back to their regular lives leaving you to jump back into motherhood before you feel ready?

-Do you have a husband that works graves and is in need of sleep during the day leaving you to manage your own recovery, taking care of a demanding newborn, and wrestling with three other children?

If you answered yes to any of these questions then The Hartshorn Club (THC) is the right place for you! Here at THC we believe in helping mothers transition to regular life when all of their help has left.

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Sprawling over a massive 1300 sq. feet THC is an impressive estate. We will watch your children closely so as to not lose them in our enormous facility. Equipped with a toy area, lunchroom, art area, Library, Movie Theater, and outside play area your kids are sure to have a blast with our FC, Boston.

So what does being a member of THC entail? It entitles the recipient of this pamphlet to AT A MINIMUM 3 days of dropping her kids off at THC. She can bring the younger ones in the morning and drop off the older one when he gets out of school. Her children will be played with, read to, entertained, fed lunch and dinner.

Unfortunately a clause in our FC, Boston’s, contract requires us to have utter and complete silence in our facility while he naps (such a pre-madonna!) so the THC member’s children will be dropped off at her house for naps then picked back up after.

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Fun Counselor (FC)

Boston R. Hartshorn

Boston graduated from TWU (The Womb University) in October of 2008 and has been working at THC ever since. He has a passion for little kids and toys. An upbeat ball of energy he will keep your kids busy and having fun. But beware.. if this counselor doesn’t get his nap he can be scary!

While Boston has accomplished much in his extremely long life so far, he plans on soon mastering going potty on the big boy potty, doing a somersault, and coloring within the lines.

The Toy area. We like to refer to this area as the toy explosion area. Each and every toy here at THC has been hand (and most likely mouth) tested and approved by our FC himself.

The outside play area is beautifully landscaped with dying patches of grass here and there while others are growing out of control. Random rocks add to the exotic feel of this play area.

The lunchroom is situated smack-dab in the middle of the kitchen so you are sure to get a very fresh lunch and dinner. ( Yes I realize me house is totally bare. When we moved back in after the fire I didn't want to unpack all the decor and curtains just to repack it in 6 months)

The Art Area. Look familiar? At THC we like to multipurpose our rooms.

Our luxury sedan will shuttle your sweet children to and from our facility.

Our movie theater. All we can say is WOW! Our grand 42 inch projection screen is sure to have your kids slack-jawed with amazement. We also offer complimentary popcorn with each movie.

And last but not least the library. Fully stocked with any book a 1-3 year old could want.

Fine Print:

· The recipient MUST use our service and not try to be superwoman and do it all by herself.

· I guess that’s all the fine print that we have